Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. ~Will Rogers

Today is a crash and burn kinda day...

You know when you have that small moment of bliss... every part of your life seems to fit together so perfectly and there's not one thing that you would change about it?

Well.. that is how my life has been so far this year....

Until today.

I learned today that while most of the people in my life love me in spite of myself, that there are others who would rather not tolerate me.  Example:

I work at a nickel arcade called Nickelmania in Murray.  It's a fun job.  Stressful at times and Saturdays are my hard days.  

I guess I am just too mean for people to work with or under or whatever... I've known this for a while.  I know that I demand a lot and expect a lot.. but I think it's because I in turn do a lot.  When I ask you, employee, to clean an area that shouldn't take longer than 10 minutes, and it takes you over 15 to 20 minutes, I think it is perfectly reasonable for me to find you, remind you to go faster, and get your behind back to work.  


I also am a firm believer that if you do it right and fast the first time, than you have more free time. 


But it is a blessing in disguise.  I hated working every Saturday.  SERIOUSLY!  I work my 'grown-up' job for 40 hours a week, and 2 nights a week, I'm at the store and then I work all day Saturday. EXHAUSTING. 


But that's only half the story.


I also found out that my 'grown-up' job is still struggling financially.  And that in turn, I won't be getting a raise.. yet again.  I've been with this company, making slightly over minimum wage, for over 2 years now.  I have NEVER received a raise.  Even when I took on more responsibilities... And I'm tired.


I want a job that I am good at, successful at, and one that will be a pleasure to work at.  So this is my prayer.  


Help me find a job/ career, that I will enjoy and be good at.  I know that like most things, there will be days of loathing toward the job.  But I want to enjoy my life with those that I love and that love me.  I want to be a good wife and mother someday, and I believe that in order to do that, I need to recognize what is inside of me and build it up to something amazing. 


I know that tomorrow will be a better day.  I know that I have multiple people to turn to and a Father in Heaven who hears my prayers and answers them in unexpected ways.  I know I have a family that supports me even when I feel like they don't.  And I have a boy who 'kinda likes me a lot' who mellows me out and makes me smile.  


Life is good.  It just hurts right now... but it will get better... It will.