Day 5 – A photo of yourself two years ago.
Past self... If I could go back and re-write my past... I want to say that I wouldn't. That I wouldn't change a single thing about life.
But that would be a lie.
I wish that I knew who I was far earlier then when I finally kinda figured it out. This picture of me to the right... That was a girl that was floundering. She didn't know quiet who she wanted to be. She just knew that she wanted to be happy.
If I could go back. I would tell myself that no boy that was worth being with, would ever make you feel like you deserved something less than what you do... if that makes sense... let's try again... I would tell myself that no boy would make your emotional welfare and your fragile self of worth feel as though you were lucky enough to be with them and the crappy way that they treat you.
If I could go back, I would take advantage of High School... Finish massage school and not be terrified of making my life actually worth something. I would not work thru High School, make better grades and avoid screwing my life up. Maybe be Josh's HS sweetheart so that we could have the story that a lot of his friends from school do.
But honestly, if I hadn't learned the lessons the way I have, I probably wouldn't have learned them. I wouldn't have grown and experienced. Learned, become frustrated... learned to trust in the Lord. Learned to trust myself.
I only wish that I could trust myself more than I do. But doubts are part of life... right? So all in all, I hope that I will take what I have learned, but remain as it's said "as a little child" and be humble enough to keep learning... and to keep trying. /sigh
Anyway... such is the ramblings of me today...
PS Totally happy that life did lead me to where I am...

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